The One With My Supposedly Speeding Ticket

So this morning, on my way to work, I got out of another one of my supposedly speeding tickets.

And contrary to what you might be thinking, no, I didn't bat my eyelashes coquettishly, showed off some cleavage (not that I have a lot to show), nor tried to bribe the officer. I swear! I didn't do anything, except sit quietly and smile nervously.

My husband seems to think it's my sweet, innocent-looking face that fools people into believing that I am, in no way, capable of doing anything wrong. Of course, there's a huge probability that he just wanted to get laid tonight so he'll say anything. But then again, maybe not, because the jerk added that if only people really knew me like he does, they'll know the truth. Even so, he might be on to something. I look pretty angelic, you know. ;-) Just don't come knocking at my door very early on a weekend morning or you'll get the biggest shock of your life.

Anyhoo, so there I was, driving happily while yakking on the phone (I know, I know... I'm horrible), oblivious to the possibility that I might be driving at 75 to 80 miles an hour (who knows for sure?) on a 65 mph speed limit. Out of nowhere, this cop car appeared ( I swear, they've learned their tricks from Harry Potter for being masters of invisibility) and started following me. I knew I was in deep sh*t the minute the dreaded blue and red siren lights started flashing. So I parked my car on the roadside, rolled down my window, and like a kid in a principal's office awaiting nervously for whats's to come, sat quietly and bite my nails until the cop came to my car.

The police came, took one look at me, and said "You know, I'm just gonna let you go. I wasn't sure if it was you or another red car. Just drive carefully, okay?"

So whether I was really speeding or not, we'll never know for sure. All I know is that this is the third time I got pulled over and let go. So either I really have a sweet, innocent-looking face or the gods must be watching over me. In fact, I can brag that I am, TECHNICALLY, a law-abiding citizen, as I have never had any single speeding ticket in the five years I've been driving in the United States.

But... knock on wood. My luck usually runs out after I brag.