The Unspoken Rules of Friendship

Imagine yourself stranded on an island, like Tom Hanks in the movie Castaway, with no one to talk to and interact with. You might welcome the peace and serenity for a few days, but after a week of solitary existence, I'm sure you'll start to go crazy with loneliness and boredom!

As the old adage goes, no man is an island. You need someone to share your joys with, someone to lean on and care for, and someone to talk to. That someone doesn't need to be a person to fall in love with, just someone you can be friends with.

In my twenty nine years of existence in this world, I feel fortunate to have found friends who gave meaning to the real definition of the word. They were friends who acted as my cheering squad during competitions and after heartbreaks, my so-called 'accomplices in crimes', my psychologists who analyzes every aspect of my problems, and my supreme court who judges dates and potential boyfriends.

In short, they were friends who made my life easier and happier.

Although I always have lots of male friends, my friendships with women are the ones that stood the test of time. Guys aren't always great at keeping in touch, and friendship with men sometimes causes complications... complications like him falling for you or vice versa, having a jealous boyfriend who can't stand the thought of you being so close to a male friend, or him having a jealous girlfriend who can't stand the thought of you. That's not to say however, that I don't have long-lasting male friends. I do. Most guys are wonderful friends and I love hearing their perspectives on things.

Still, women understand and relate to each other better, and so make truly amazing friends! That doesn't mean though, that women friendships are always smooth sailing. I think one of the main ingredients in having successful ones is following some sort of unwritten girl laws.

These are the top five rules my girlfriends and I used to live by (now that we're all older and miles away from each other, the major rule just seems to be ... always keep in touch!). Feel free to add yours.

1. Be there when she needs you. Oftentimes, a girl friend just needs someone who will listen or a shoulder to cry on, so be one.

2. Accept her for everything she is. A true friendship is one where you should feel most comfortable being your real self.

3. Never compete or fight over a guy. It's not worth it. Boyfriends come and go, but true friends stick together though the end of time. (And that brings me to not neglecting your friends the minute you found a boyfriend!)

4. Never date your friend's ex. He might be an ex, but he's definitely off limits. How would you feel if your friend who knows most of the gory details of your past relationship dates the guy who's the main character of those stories? (Some people might not agree with me on this, but trust me, it's better!)

5. Be honest. I'm always an advocate of honesty, because I'd rather get hurt knowing the truth than feel like a fool later for being lied to. That basically includes telling me if you saw my boyfriend with another woman or if you caught him lying to me!

Friends are one of the greatest things in this world. As Edna Buchanan quoted, 'friends are family that WE CHOOSE for ourselves.' Enough said!