Love Knows No Cultural Boundaries

Never in my wildest childhood dreams did it occur to me, that I would someday travel thousands of miles away from home and meet my prince in a far, far away land. I've always thought that my knight in shining armor would be someone from my own country with the same culture, who eats the same food and speak the same language. I preferred it that way, since I thought that the connection and understanding between us would be better.

I came to the United States several years ago armed with that thought. Even though I was coming to a foreign soil, I hoped and prayed that I would still meet someone from my own land.

Somewhere along the way however, I met a guy with a different culture who opened my eyes to an entirely new way of thinking. He showed me that love knows no cultural or racial boundaries. We might each have different skin colors, eat different foods or observe different traditions, but deep inside, we're all humans who have the same ability to love, care for and connect with other human beings. It doesn't matter where you're from, the emotions that run through all our veins are the same. Although my relationship with him ended, I learned so much from him. He taught me, more than anything, to be more open-minded.

And so, I found happy ending in my real destined prince from this faraway land. Sure, he loves pizza and I love rice, he's crazy about football and I don't understand a thing about it, I speak a language he has no clue about, but... love holds us firm and strong. The truth is, we are much more similar than we are different. We have the same religious belief (which is that, we believe in God but not so much in religion), we both love to travel and hike, we agree on how to handle our finances, and we have the same visions for the future. More than that, he has all the qualities I look for in a guy... gorgeous, very smart, completely sweet, loves me unconditionally, knows how and when to say sorry, does his share of household chores... heck, what more can I ask for? His family even loves me like their own and make me feel like I really belong!

But most importantly, he and I have high respect for each other's cultures and has no difficulty on blending the two in our one shared life.

We still get the look from narrow-minded people occasionally (which I'm sure would also happen when I take him to the Philippines). But who cares? I know one thing for sure...

Love knows no racial or cultural boundaries. In fact, love knows NO boundaries.

Of Men, Dating and Love

For women's eyes only ;-)

I'm not a Men or Dating Expert. I'd be honest and say that I did date a number of guys on my search for Mr. Right (as I'm sure most of you did), but I don't think that makes me an expert. I can say however, that with each dating mishap and/or experience, I tried to learn as much as I can, and made sure that I won't repeat the same mistake over and over again. And now that I have left the dating world behind, I wanna share the lessons I've learned (and still learning) about men, dating and love in general. Feel free to add yours...

*There's no such thing as love at first sight. Love takes time to blossom and flourish. Love is when you know the person (really know him... which takes time), and can accept him for everything he is - flaws and all. Dont confuse lust or attraction with love.

*Don't date just because you're bored, afraid of being single or because the guy's nice. Date a guy because you can feel the chemistry between the two of you. Trust me, you'll end up happier.

*Most men are big babies. No matter what age they are. They wanna be cuddled, shown affection and unconditionally loved... but then again, who the heck doesn't?

*No matter what they say, men love to chase (or at least be challenged) and women loves being chased. There's a right amount of chasing though, so be careful. Too many games can ruin what might be a good relationship.

* If a guy is really into you, you'll know. (Remember the movie, He's Not That Into You? So true! And I love that movie, btw!) Pay attention to his actions, not his words.

* Don't waste your time on a guy who's not that into you thinking you can change his mind. There's a 95% chance he won't. Life is too short to waste it on the wrong person.

* Men will always look at, or notice, an attractive women - even if they're already in a relationship. They can't help it, they're inherently visual creatures. But it doesn't mean that they love you less, so don't get jealous. Besides, let's be honest... don't we notice attractive men, as well?

* Men wanna be with women who are attractive to them. They have different ideas of beauty though, so even if you're not Angelina Jolie or Heidi Klum look alike... no worries. You're attractive to your man!

* A lot of men don't have an idea of how to really romance a woman the way women want them to. They usually have a different idea. So if you want something, you gotta ask for it. If your guy listens and wants to please you, then you know you've got a good man who loves you.

Ladies, what have you learned from dating?

Taking Risks

Let's say you're traveling on a forest and reached a crossroad where you have to choose between two routes that lead to your destination. One is a safer, beaten path, with fewer obstacles along the way. It leads straight to your destination, but the view is anything but spectacular. The other is a more difficult, longer route but with the most amazing sights you'll ever see and the possibility of the most exciting journey you'll ever go through. Which route would you take?

I'd take the second route without hesitation.

I'd take the riskier and more exciting route because that is the only way to live life to the fullest. Life is too short to be wasted on dull, uneventful moments. It might be more dangerous and you might be slowed down by more obstacles, but then, the obstacles are what make victory sweeter in the end. When you finally reach your destination, your feeling of fulfillment could never be equaled.

I took the biggest risk of my life when I moved thousand of miles away from home to a different, unfamiliar place where I didn't know anybody and wasn't sure if I'd make it. I had a succesful job in my country, a family who loves me, a guy who adores me and a network of wonderful friends. But I left everything behind to pursue my dream of going to graduate school and starting an independent life. It was absolutely tough in the beginning. I spent nights crying of homesickness, but the fighter in me decided to hang on. As a result, I got my graduate degree, found an even greater job and met the true man of my dreams. I've never felt happier and more fulfilled.

And I'd rather take the risks than live the rest of my life asking questions of what if? Life is full of crossroads that require you to make decisions. You might make the wrong ones and fail, but the more important thing is, you took the risk. In truth, the biggest regrets in our lives are the risks we didn't take. Don't be a person who has to look back and wonder what they would have been or could have had. Move out of your comfort zone. There are only a few things in this world that can never be retrieved, and one of them is neglected opportunities.

The thing is, life is a one way street. No matter how many detours you take, none of them leads back. So take the more exciting road because you'll never pass that way again. And never allow failure to hinder you from reaching your destination. If on the way, you trip, just get up and move on. Move on stronger and wiser.

Don't allow life to be simply a journey, make it an adventure!

Say Hello...

... to a married woman!

Yes, I did get married at the courthouse on St. Patrick's Day. The ceremony was short... it was over in 15 minutes! It was just the two of us that day, but we're planning to have a small reception with Husband's family sometime during the summer. Anyway, for our mini-honeymoon, we went to Chicago, and had a wonderful time.

People had been asking me if I felt different after getting married.

Honestly?... I don't feel any different!

I don't know if it's because I don't exactly have my big wedding yet or if there's really no difference. Sometimes, I think movies and fairy tales make too much of weddings and marriages, but in reality it's not as idealistic or as dreamy as it seems. Really... how am I supposed to feel? I knew I already love my husband very much before I married him. I don't know if it's possible to love him any more than I already do. The only difference that I know of and feel now, is that I see him everyday. I wake up every morning beside him and go home to him every night. And I do agree... that is a wondeful feeling! I guess you can say that getting married gives you more stability and a feeling of security. .. The thought that whatever happens, your spouse would be there to love and support you. But the thing is, I've always felt that way with my husband ever since I've known him. Getting married basically, just makes it official.

But I can say that I am absolutely happy. I still need to get used to calling him my husband and being referred to as his wife, but I'm getting there. He's been a great husband so far. Two days ago, he came home early and had dinner ready for me. And yesterday, he went to the grocery store and bought things he knew I would like, as well as gave me a very sweet card!

Well, if this is what married life's like, I definitely can get used to it!

First Ticket

I'm temporarily breaking my hibernation to post a short rant.

A cop gave me my first ticket yesterday. Yes, my very first. I'm usually a law-abiding citizen. ;-)

And no, it's not for speeding!

It's for talking on the phone while driving!!! Yes, seriously! How the heck am I supposed to know that I was driving by one of the very few cities in Ohio that imposes the 'no talking while driving' law? Okay, I know, I know! With or without law, I shouldn't be doing that in the first place, so I guess that should teach me two lessons.

(1) Don't talk while driving!
(2) Pay attention to road signs (big or small)!

And you know what the irony is? I was actually at the store thinking of buying a Bluetooth last weekend (you know, that thing you use on your ear that makes other people feel stupid thinking you're talking to them and then realizing you're not?), but decided to put it off and save money for our Chicago trip. Well, I'm definitely spending money to buy one now, in addition to paying a $105 fee! Ugh!

Busy Life

I haven't been posting as much as I usually to do. And I apologize.

March is proving to be such a busy month for me. First of all, I'm getting married at the courthouse in 10 days. Yes, 10 days! On St. Patricks day! Fiance and I went to get our marriage license last week and scheduled our wedding. Turned out that was the only day during the week we wanted, that the courthouse would perform weddings. So we decided we might as well set it that day. Kinda unromantic I know, but I don't consider that my real wedding (the real one's on January, 2010) so it's not a big deal for me. (Read this and this for my wedding plans.)

Secondly, I'm moving to Fiance's apartment in a few weeks. And do you know how much pain packing is? Now I understand why there's such a thing as Movers. They make life easy! But we gotta save money to buy a house so I had no choice but to move my lazy butt and do it myself.

Third, I have to go to Chicago in a few days to do some lab testing for my job. Fiance decided to tag along so we'll be spending next weekend in that beautiful place.

And did I tell you that our company reorganized everybody's offices and cubicles? Now my cube is in front of my boss' office and directly in his line of sight! You know what that means, don't you? No more blogging on workdays for me! :-)

I do promise however, that I'll try my very best to post from time to time and read all your wonderful blogs.

Acceptance

Acceptance. Theoretically, it seems so easy, but in reality, it's one of the hardest thing to do in life. How do you accept and take the pain when your heart gets broken, the sorrow when a family member dies or the bitter taste of defeat? It's human nature to feel these emotions! Emotions brought about by things we have no control of, things we feel completely powerless about... but things we desperately wish would never happen to us.

I struggled so hard with acceptance when I was a kid. I've always been involved in all sorts of competitions - academic or otherwise. But as with all competitions, it's either you win or you lose. When you win, of course, acceptance is easy! But when you lose, it's a different story. Your mind goes through all the things you did and try to analyze what you did wrong. I was a competitive kid, and it took me a while to stop beating myself up and accept that I won't win all battles. All I can do is be more prepared the next time and do better.

Fast forward to the present. I learned to be more accepting though the course of years. I've learned that not everthing in life goes according to my plans or what I want, and was able to accept the outcome wholeheartedly. The key is just looking at the brighter side and accepting that it's just part of life. And believing there's a reason why it happened that way. I do admit that there are times when I still struggle with acceptance. But I did come to grips and accept facts like...

... I can't sing for the life of me.

... I would only grow to be 5'2 tall, and not an inch taller.

... you might be a popular girl in school but the boy you like might still not like you.

... awkwardness is part of growing up.

... nothing in life comes easy. You have to study and work hard to achieve your dreams.

... you'll come across some b*tchy and mean people once in a while.

... you'll go through a series of heartbreaks before you find Mr. Right.

... there's no such thing as a Perfect Man.

... you can't be perfect either.

... the people you love won't always be around ( so you have to tell them how much you love them while they're still here).

... you won't always have everything you want.

... you can't avoid embarassing situations.

... pain and heartaches make you stronger. No pain, no gain.

I believe that acceptance is a state of mind. It is a choice. A choice that is hard to make but with willpower, is achievable. If not, I guess we can just always pray...

"God, give me the serenity to accept the things I can not change..."

My bloggy friends, what have you learned to accept over the years?